8-4-16 My monthly blood and weight check. They are both stable, TYL. It is only by His grace and mercy that I am yet fighting the fight. I know of other friends, that I consider as family, that are not doing so well. TYL that I have not had any surgeries or long term hospitalizations. I continue to pray against the enemy that is attacking them and their families. I realize that the attack is not just against me but everyone that loves and cares about me, in some way we all suffer.

During this journey I have had the chance to read a lot of awesome writings and I am convinced that anything that is not like the Lord or for my good is an enemy to me. (And Joshua said unto them, Fear not, nor be dismayed, be strong and of good courage: for thus shall the Lord do to all your enemies against whom ye fight. Joshua 10:25) When you know who or what the enemy is better it makes the fight easier. I didn’t always know the enemy or think I had the proper weapons needed to fight. (When I wept, and chastened my soul with fasting, that was to my reproach. Psalm 69:10)  The Lord heard my cries and showed me what I needed to do or say. So along with not calling my condition out I stop allowing others, including my doctors, to use the medical term for it. I would stop anyone and say “I have been told I have an inoperable mass in my liver”. I have been used to speaking or claiming things that the Lord did not mean for me to keep, NOT ANY MORE. It is a fight of reconditioning the way I think and pray. TYL for loving me and the people you send to encourage me and allow me to testify of your goodness. My His blessings be with you is my continued prayer.

7-1-16        It has been a little over a month since my last treatment. I guess I had hoped I would instantly be the person I was 3 or 4 years ago. I do feel better, not as tired all of the time. I believe I will continue feel to better each day. TYL (Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them. Mark 11:24)

7-3-16        A lady told me I had a good attitude with everything that I have been through and what I am going through now. I told her we all have choices and although it may not change the outcome, it makes me feel better and I hope the people around me too. Carrying a sign or portraying a “doomed” appearance makes me feel worse. I can’t speak for anyone but me, “It lightens the load knowing I am not walking alone and He would want me to look my best and encourage others to the best of my ability.” (He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the Lord require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? Micah 6:8)

7-7-16        Another check up. Everything is looking good, except I lost weight. My appetite is not the best, but I have been trying to eat, and people are trying to help me by providing a variety of foods for us. TYL for caring people and I pray for each of them to have good health and prosper. (For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Jeremiah 29:11)

7-19-16    3:30 a.m. I was awaken by music. At first I thought my son had come home from work and was playing the gospel channel, then I realized it was coming from the computer. “Glory, Glory Hallelujah since I laid my burdens down”. (And I will take you to me for a people, and I will be to you a God: and ye shall know that I am the Lord your God, which bringeth you out from under the burdens of the Egyptians. Exodus 6:7) After trying to turning off the computer, reading, checking on Chris, trying to get comfortable on the couch, I did what I felt the Lord was telling me to do “WRITE”. It is now 5:18 a.m., I am feeling tired and soon it will be time to start the day, but I know He will help me have a peaceful day. TYL He helped me have a peaceful restful day.

It has been a busy month. I a so glad I am able to assist with things at the church and the Lord is helping me feel better. I still have my ups and downs, but I know He is always with me.